Protective parents and overprotective parents are not the same. Protective parenting is a vital aspect of parenting. The need to take care of our children is an instinct. It is to confer enriching affection and qualities that will help in promoting development and also improve physical and emotional well-being.
Overprotective parents, however, have a clear limiting effect and nullify the child, favoring complete dependency. Overprotective and hyper-parenting are educational styles based on excessive attention to a child, always seeking to solve their problems even before they ask for help.
In addition, overprotective parenting will only have negative consequences for children’s present and future. Therefore, this results in dependent and insecure adults who might find it difficult to bounce back from setbacks and disappointment.
Who are overprotective parents?
Parents who are constantly in charge of avoiding distressing, conflicting, or painful situations for their children are considered overprotective parents.
These insecure parents tend to instill extreme prudence and have feelings of hyper-responsibility for what happens to their children.
Who is a helicopter parent?
In the field of psychology, parents who overly control their children are known as “helicopter parents.” This overprotective behavior affects the emotional stability of the little ones and limits their creative capacity.
The term refers to how these parents constantly control the decisions and attitudes of their children. Although this supervision limits both the freedom and decision-making of children.
How overprotective parents affect the child
An overprotective family, or hyper-parenting, makes it difficult to have a healthy and happy childhood. It also has a significant impact on the child’s future. Let’s look at how being an overprotective parent can affect your child:
Difficulty developing skills
Overprotective parenting prevents the development of important life skills in children. These skills include problem-solving, critical thinking, empathy, and autonomy, among others.
The first source of significant learning occurs through direct experience, and for it to occur, direct experiences must occur.
The child who does not fall in the park does not understand that he must be careful if he does not want to get hurt, and so with everything.
Skills improve with practice. If there is no practice, they do not improve. If they do not improve, we are diminishing the capacity for personal development.
By being overprotective, over time, children may become insecure as they grow. When children are not allowed to solve problems on their own without interference, they are unable to do so without seeking help from others.
Overprotective parenting can create a dependent personality in a child, making it impossible to take a step without the help of others. They may end up demanding assistance and thinking it is their right. Overprotection makes personal autonomy impossible. In the long run, their self-esteem and self-concept may also be diminished or harmed.
Inability to learn from mistakes
When a child is prevented from taking responsibility for their decisions and choices. They end up not being aware of their strengths and weaknesses. They might not learn correctly from their mistakes.
Low tolerance for frustration
Overprotective parents ensure their children do not suffer and get everything they want. They lack a tolerance for frustration. Sooner or later, life and society can happen, and that is when real problems arise. Most likely, they react to frustrations with anger, demands, and even aggression, which can lead to difficulties in social relationships and life in general.
It is possible that, in an overprotective family, the children may feels that they have everything and that the parents are servants who are only there to fulfill their wishes.
Overprotective parents can cause dissatisfaction in a child. In the long run, this dissatisfaction can affect all areas of life, especially personal life. A harmful non-conformity that can keep an individual from being active and moving forward in life. This hinders the child’s desire to excel and search for happiness.
Keys to promoting the autonomy of our children
Overprotective parenting can affect a child’s physical, social, and mental well-being. Overprotection hinders growth in children, making them overly dependent on their parents. That is why it is essential to take into account the keys to promoting autonomy in children:
Replace fear with trust
The first step to stopping the overprotection of children is a change in mentality.
As a parent, believe in your child’s capabilities and trust that they can handle situations on their own. Children can think for themselves, they can do certain things for themselves, and they can solve school issues for themselves. They are also capable of dressing themselves.
When children are taught various life skills at a young age, they end up capable of taking responsibility without constant supervision. Children will make mistakes, but when they fail and try again, they learn and grow. And when they eventually get it right, it boosts their self-esteem.
Do not rush to their aid
Encourage your child to do certain age-appropriate tasks themselves, with little to no supervision. For instance, your child can help clean the table or water plants. When children are allowed to do things for themselves, it helps improve their self-confidence and builds trust in their abilities.
Thinking solutions together
Many parents believe it is their responsibility to be a hero in their child’s life. Unfortunately, your child is their hero. Most parents love to rescue their children from problems and give them solutions quickly.
But that’s not how you teach children to think. So, in the face of a problem or a conflict, even a sibling conflict, before settling and imposing punishment, it is preferable to ask them. “How do you think we can solve this?” Surely this way they will learn and brainstorm effective solutions.
Learn from the consequences
The consequences of children’s actions are better teachers than lectures and reproaches from parents. If a child does not want to do his or her homework, perhaps it is best to let them live with the consequences of this action.
Consequences that the teacher has established than walking behind them and asking them thousands of times to do their homework. Some parents even go as far as doing their child’s homework.
In another instance, if a child playing ball decides to leave the ball outside, a very possible consequence is that it gets stolen. And from the consequences of their actions, children learn. Sometimes it can be difficult for us to let them suffer the consequences, but many times it is the only way for them to learn something resoundingly.
When an overprotective child becomes an adult, they may find it difficult to maintain an orderly and positive life.
Related: Raise Independent Children With these Easy Strategies
How can I heal my child from overprotective parenting?
To promote autonomy, we recommend that the child learns from all experiences by finding solutions to certain problems and deciding how to deal with them.
The child must be aware of his obligations; this will create habits that he must then fulfill on his own as part of his responsibility at home or school.
Celebrate achievements and failures
If children fail in some activities, parents should encourage them to keep trying to get different results. In the same way, in the face of triumph, they must be the first to recognize the child’s effort.
As parents, letting your child choose their path to success and mistakes is necessary for them to have their own experiences. In this way, in the future, they will be able to be an active part of society and have the best boost to make the best decisions.
Put aside those negative practices of overprotective parents and become a guide for your children’s personal and social growth. Learn to give your child the freedom they need to learn and develop optimally for the challenges of living in this society.
For More Article: Visit A Mom And More.